Tuesday, December 31, 2013

2014! And sometimes toddlers are crazy.

Collin has reached the age where inappropriate things sprout loudly from his mouth in public. Examples:

I'm browsing the produce section of Trader Joe's, when from my cart comes the excited squeak of Collin's little voice as he spots a man in a yarmulke (traditional Jewish head covering).
Collin: Mama! Is he a Chanukah guy??
Me: Um... (Oh my god, did he hear that?? Is he looking over here? Quick, steer the cart away! Steer away!)
Collin: Is it Chanukah time??
Me: Um, no honey, it's not. Hey, look, bananas!  (Que mama speed pushing the cart away in shame as I try to redirect the toddler)

I really wanted to say to the guy, "We're Jewish! It's cool!" But I was hoping he just didn't hear anything.

And the other day, standing in line at the Mexican bakery that was filled to the rafters with pinatas, I am foolish enough to point out the Batman.
Me: Look Collin, it's Batman! See him? He's the one in black.
Collin: IS HE BLACK??  (I swear, his voice shot up ten decibels for this one. This is the part where the entire bakery turns and looks at us.)
Me: Um, well, he's wearing black, if that's what you mean...

(For the record, he was talking about Batman's clothing choices).

Is this similar to what my mother felt when I screamed the "S" word in front of a little old lady when I was two?

Mostly, though, I'm flushed by Collin's  sheer cuteness versus his power of embarrassment. He is so engaging with everyone he meets (Perhaps a little too engaging? Like the time he bit an old lady with a dragon puppet in the Salvation Army?). He makes this mama kvell.

In other news, I'm so pregnant,  I can't see my feet anymore. I'm so pregnant,  I take showers every morning not because it's delightful and makes me feel like a real human, but because I'm too big to bend over the sink and wash up the lazy way. I'm tired all the time. All. The. Time. I live in a paradoxical universe of anxiety over the future, and excitement about it. I'm so excited to meet my daughter.  I love her so much already. But change is still change, and change is not easy.

It will be 2014 in two hours. I'm tired. But ready.

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